A game like thinger (stolen from Westy!)

okay, this part I copied and pasted: The first six people to respond to this post will get something made by me.

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:

- What I create will be personalized and intended for you.

- It’ll be done this year (2009).

- You will have no idea what it’s going to be. It may be a poem, a story or article collection, a food item, an herbal mix or tea or incense, a recipe collection, a piece of jewelry, or anything in between! Who knows? Not you, that’s for sure!

The catch? You have to put this offer in your journal or blog as well, and make six things for your friends!

This part is totally ME except I can't get the Italics to turn off... damn it... so I'll make it BOLD.

okay, I got the italics turned off, but decided to keep this part in bold so you will READ IT. thanks!

Okay, so I'm gonna do my bestest to follow through assuming that people actually want to participate. I'm not really that creative in the kitchen, and I sure as hell don't know how to make incense, but there is a fair bit I CAN do, given enough time and some cash in a craft store. I'm not the best about getting stuff in the mail (sorry anyone who didn't receive their Christmas cards... those are still sitting on my shelf, I never did get around to getting stamps...)

Anyways, with the time line of the whatever being received, and who knows, maybe I'll write a poem? except, probably not, cause I haven't been doing much of that lately. Maybe a blog? eh... not really a blogger though I do have a digital camcorder I've never used... who knows, I'll think of SOMETHING, assuming that people actually want to participate.

First six. LEAVE ME COMMENTS NOW!

musical survey stolen from myspace

Go to your music player of choice and put it on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and press play. Use the song titles that come up to answer each question.


NO CHEATING!

How does the world see me?
Overweight- Blue October.


Och

Will I have a happy life?
Alone, Together- The Strokes.


What do people really think of me?
Bad Scene and a Basement Show- Less Than Jake


Do people secretly lust after me?
So Nice, So Smart- Kimya Dawsone



How can I make myself happy?
Retro Vertigo- Mr.
Bungle

What should I do with my life?
Ramona- Guster

oh.


Will I ever have children?
Thru The Eyes of Ruby- Smashing Pumpins


What is some good advice for me?
Daria- Cake



What do I think my current theme song is?
Whose Got The Crack- Moldy Peaches

errr...

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Jesus on the Radio- Guster



What type of men/women do I like?
She's Only 18- Red Hot Chili Peppers.



So... I like younger guys?

What is my day (tomorrow) going to be like?
You Look Like I need a Drink- Against Me!

uhm... sums things up fairly well, me thinks...


Why am I here?
Piano Man- Ghostland Observatory


What will people remember me for?
Nothin' - Reel Big Fish


Oh, dear...


What song will I get stuck in my head tomorrow?
The Space They Can't Touch- Less Than Jake

What will this year be all about?
Good Bye In Gasoline- Less Than Jake


HELLZ YEA!!!! This song is the song I ALWAYS play as the plain leaves Florida...
(if you don't know this song look up the lyrics... seriously, best song for leaving...)

A dream, dreamt.

[17:14] Clairesey83: I had a dream that I smoked your pot
[17:15] Aunty missi: ok...
[17:15] Aunty missi: I don't have any pot
[17:15] Clairesey83: yea, it was an odd dream
[17:15] Aunty missi: sounds like it
[17:15] Clairesey83: actually, it was your sisters pot, that you bought for her
[17:15] Clairesey83: so then I owed your sister money
[17:15] Clairesey83: and man, she was a bitch
[17:16] Clairesey83: but then, I probably would have been too if someone had smoked my pot
[17:16] Aunty missi: lol, which sister
[17:16] Clairesey83: I don't know
[17:16] Clairesey83: oh, and i'm fairly certain the apartment we were in was somewhere in Florida
[17:16] Clairesey83: and I woke up in your bed, your minnesota bed
[17:17] Aunty missi: hahaha
[17:17] Clairesey83: and got up and sat down at the desk, found a bag of pot and started sorting through the seeds and sticks and packed a bowl and saved some for later
[17:18] Clairesey83: and some guy was like "i'm not sure you should be doing that"
[17:18] Clairesey83: oh, i think there was a party... lots of long haired guys with no shirts on
[17:18] Clairesey83: but like i said, we were in florida, and thats actually pretty common...
[17:19] Clairesey83: we had terazzo floors
[17:19] Clairesey83: well, the guys w/o a shirt is fairly common
[17:20] Aunty missi: you are strange indeed
[17:20] Clairesey83: but you love me anyway, right?
[17:20] Aunty missi: yeah

A new post, because well, I owe one?

I haven't been updating like I used to.

I have plenty to say, I just can't seem to get it to leave my head.

I'm just bumming around the universe trying to make my own place. You know, the usual.

Except, by universe, I mean this shitty house in this shitty town.
Deep down, I love this house, actually, its the people I love, and the character that we have built here over the the past score of years.

I'm not sure if I used score correctly, its such an underused word. I wasn't sure if I needed to add "years" after it or not.

I received a cheap little digital camcorder for christmas. I have yet to make any type of video of any actual substance. I have yet to even upload the software onto Wembley.

Wembley is this machine, by the way. People seem to find it odd that not only did I name my computer, but I also refer to it by name.

PA is the new WA, for anyone who has any idea what the might mean. The time line is in question and a whole new set of plans has to be made, and executed.

okay, so anyway, eventually i'll get around to making some type of video of some sort.
I took the camcorder thing with me on new years, with the plan of making a drunken video, but well, my new years plans did NOT happen like I had planned.

I can STILL see the outline of the bitemark on my left hand. I have yet to contact her. I'm not even sure what all I will say to her, I don't want to be bitchy, or rude, or sappy or overly emotional. I want to get my point across without being too blunt. I'm not even sure if I should even say anything to her, except well, I think I might want to.

I have so many unfinished projects, and projects that aren't even started, and I just... maybe they will be complete some time, some day. Who knows.

This entry isn't what I planned it to be, but seeing how I started this with no plan, maybe thats okay.

Either way, I'm out.

guess I have a lot on my mind

because here it is, 5:14 am and I'm still awake.

crap.

Well, considering I didn't fall asleep until almost 7am yesterday, and I did sleep until about 2:30pm today, thats really not all that surprising.

However, my alarm is set to go off at 7am, and I'm scheduled in at work at 10.

have I said crap, yet?

yes, I did.

I decided about two (?) hours ago that if I was still awake at 5:30 i'd get up and take a shower, which, really, should have been taken hours ago.

A nice, long shower, get in a good shave, all that, except... that'll knock me out.

I know this because my body is tired. my muscles are sore and achey and i don't have much energy...

but my damn brain won't slow down.

I have a lot on it. Plans and opportunities that have arisen and changed and morphed and been reborn.

cryptic, again, I know. I can't give details out yet, because well, even though mentally I have plans going full swing, I still have to cross check everything and change a few things.

oh. and the fact that i'm broke broke broke.

Oh, and somehow in the past hour, I've started a lovely sounding hacky cough, and the thought of calling out is seeming more and more appealing, though, i KNOW i'm not sick. I'll jsut sleep away the shift, which... my sleep schedule is fucked, but I'm not calling out of work so I can sleep.

I'm yawning like crazy now, but my mind: zoom zooom zoooooooooom, there it goes along.

damn this. 5:20.

okay, shower time. get in a nice shave, cause the only pants I have clean are my capri's. It'll be a bit cool for capri's, but I'll be inside all day, and I can always wear long sleeves, so i'm not too concerned.

so. I'll take the damn shower, then reset the alarm for 9, pray I can crash out, get up at 9 toss the pants in the dryer, cause they're whoa wrinkled, and right now I hate my iron and besides if I sleep til 9, thatll cut too close my ironing time. I won;t have the chance to style my hair like I hoped, but i'll be able to make it look decent, and makeup shouldnt be too big of an issue, I can either go without, (i'd rather not, I was hoping to have a cute day) or just do my usual staple of powder, lipstick, and mascara. I'll eat an orange, have a few cups of coffee, toss a yogurt in my purse and leave the house around 940.


damn. today is gonna suck.

maybe I'm a bitch. Maybe I'm just me.

He wanted to hang out tonight.

At first I agreed. On my terms.

He could come over, but we would sit on the front porch. He would no come inside.

I told him everyone else was either in bed, or on their way to bed. They got up early, I said. We should stay outside. Keep the noise levels down.

Just sit, and talk. Like old times.

Like, before, when he would sneak over in the middle of the night, parking his car on the county's grass across the street. Sometimes, we would just sit out their for hours and talk.

Later, we would sit out there for hours and smoke, as well as talk.

We had a lot to say in those days. Often interrupting each other, not letting the other finish before we would start in on a totally different tangent. Occasionally you could elbow your way back in and weave the topic back to its starting point.

Usually, the conversation started at point A and wound up somewhere down a few black holes and in a field full of unicorn.

Later, after sitting for hours on the porch, we would work our way inside, to the back, where my room was. It got to the point when the other people here no longer asked whose red car was parked out front. It got to a point when no one bothered asking what time he had arrived, or what we did, or if we had fun.

Then it got to a point when we started changing. Drifting. Growing. Moving on.

Except, now, it appears even though over two years have past, we're back at where we were.

I'm the one that wanted to get back in touch, but now i'm blanching. I should have waited until I had moved on, moved out, left the state and was on the other side of the country.

He claims to have changed, yet when he talks, its the exact same guy that I was infatuated with, except, I'm older, and feel wiser, and he's still talking the same bull shit and telling the same stories and the same lies. I see through it now for what it is.

He says he "loves me to death" and he wants to stay friends. Stay in each others lives.

Yet, after he called back to say he was ot of the shower, and almost on his way over, I waited a few minutes. Thought things through.

Then I called him back.

He was just one untied shoe string away from walking out the door. I told him It was getting later, and that everyone else was on their way to bed, and I wasn't in the mood to talk. I was more in the mood of staying in the house. In my room. Alone. And watching a movie. Alone.

I was backtracking. Apologizing. Saying not to come. Maybe some other time.

He understood. I think he understood better than I could ever give him credit for understanding.

I have forgotten where I was headed with this. I no longer know.

With that, I am out.

An Actual Conversation (hey look, its an actual post!)

-SoundEcho walks into garage/den blowing heat off a fresh cup of coffee-
-Dad/Garage guru, sees fresh cup of coffee and gets all excited-
Dad/Garage guru: "Why, you made a fresh pot of coffee! Aren't you a chrome plated sweetheart!"
SoundEcho: "Uhm, yea, I did make a pot of coffee, but I didn't bring you any."
Dad/Garage guru: "Well, fine then, remove the chrome plating!"
SoundEcho: "Well, at least I'm still a sweetheart!"

Over a week later, and the bruises are still showing. (we're ignoring the fact that bruises take their sweet ass time healing on my skin) I'm going with my moms advice to "wait until the bruises are completely gone before you send her any type of reply".

I still haven't heard anything from her, except the text message last thursday afternoon. (the one where she said her husband TOLD her what happened and she understands if I hate her.) I just want to clarify that I don't hate her. Hate doesn't begin to even explain anything to do with the emotions I felt the days following the 'incident'. I want her to know this. It's a terrible burdon thinking someone hates you, when infact, they don't. Especially if the person knows the true definition of hate. (I do. I don't know if she does, but I do, and I know that its a highly misused word. At least the way I was raised) I also want to know what her husuband told her of the events.


Okay, moving on.

I think I've been able to convince my yankee manager at work to call me "C.B" instead of the grossly overused pet name that I only allow family and close friends to call me.

Now, if I can just get the cute 19yr old country boy to stop calling me that. (he insists he's quoting a movie... i'd believe him except I know that movie, and I did NOT appriciate Chistopher Walkin saying my moms petname for me in his highly creepy Christopher Walkin voice)


Tonight, I am having a girly night. Dinner at a crappy chain eating establishment, followed by the quintesential chick flick. (bride wars)

We don't usually go to the crappy chain place, but we're both between paydays, and she has a gift card. We're going to eat fairly early, and then go to the 'late' showing of the movie (9:45)

We have a LOT to talk about, we always do, because we go weeks w/o talking. Nights out with my girly friend are awesome.



Oh. My ex called last night. I wasn't in the room, so he left voicemail. I was busy playing 'scene it' on the 360 with my bro (and oddly, my mom joined in...) I forgot that the ex wanted to try to be friends. I was perfectly content with seeing him the one time and then going on my little way.

I spoke with my store manager last night. He said he will call the WA store on Monday to see about if I can transfer. I am off Monday and Tuesday, so you can bet my ass will be calling the store on Monday to see if he actually did it or not. I have no idea if I'll be able to transfer. So much is riding on it, and to be honest I have pretty low hope. If theyre store and hour situation is anything like my current stores hour situation, then I won't be able to transfer. Even 20 hours a week, which is what i'm currently getting (and i'm lucky to even get THAT) would be welcome. It would be SOMETHING.

I need my w2. NOW. however, BBB always mails their w2's out, and we never receive them until the end of the month. As soon as I get that sucker, i'm filing my freaking taxes. I don;t think anyone realizses how broke I am. I thought I was broke last year... nope. I need my tax money to finance this trip/move.


All right, I'm out.